Resume___gap

At the soaring height of my mid-level career,
I made the bold decision to move into my parents' basement.

Months later, with months' rent saved, I crawled out to travel the world.
Here are some memories and intrusive thoughts I was lucky to experience:

Bangkok

Pickpocketers at Buddhist temples, ridding you of material possessions. Forced conversion?

Spirits are your permanent landlords.

Fortune predicts misfortune.

Chiang Mai

Pigeons eating your Khao Kha Mu crumbs - trickle down economics.

Freelancers roam the streets, charging for love by the hour.

Seoul

Subway grates emit smells of baked goods.

Dragons as a form of contraception.

Blind tasting - when the soup fogs your glasses.

There is no democracy in art.

Tokyo

Took a standardized test to order ramen.

Claustrophobic binge drinking.

Osaka

Ashtrays are the entrees.

Pokemon GO is the superior dating app.

Automatic toilets greet you with open lids.

Busan

Hate is a squatter in the house of peace.

An intercom relationship in the metro station.

Hong Kong

Buildings with bamboo braces.

Grandma got picked up in a 'Rrari.

An orchestra of slurps at hot pot.

Hanoi

Prison toilets clogged with communist manifestos.

Chicken rectum for Thanksgiving.

Don't serve the deceased uncooked meat.

Saigon

The rice pot is a war veteran.

Dream big! They won't tax your dreams.

If dying of thirst, don't just grab a bottle of fish sauce.

Southern Province (Sri Lanka)

Mosquitos are used needles with wings.

Dogs are the cheapest yoga instructors.

Huế

Crack open a can of bird's saliva.

Aquatic hitch hiked successfully.

Guangzhou

Treat the dead as if they're alive.

The chicken tastes like chicken (the highest compliment).

Luzon (Philippines)

Don't step on used chocolate syringes.

Funeral processions end at 7-Eleven.

Coin-operated wifi.

Xi'An

Fresh oysters on life support.

Disapproving looks at the marriage market.

Porn stars on fire (cocktail).

Singapore

Freedom of speech is a gateway drug.

Do airline push carts count as dim sum?

Minas Gerais (Brasil)

Smoking nicotine tamales.

Salivating at the dog's television.

Florianópolis

Be the enemy of the end.

Undressed appropriately for the nude beach.

Montevideo

My love is socialistic.